Snow Day

Snow is a lot of work . . . for Wayne. I don't do much shoveling, especially these days. But snow is a lot of fun too. Julia gets to enjoy snow angels, sledding/tubing, snowman building and snowflake eating - stuff I never got to do as a kid. In college, when passing playgrounds in the winter, I remember thinking that it is so much easier growing up in CA, never having to bundle up to go outside and play. That remains true, but there are perks to growing up in the northeast.

We went into a local knick knack store with Christmas Village houses, figurines, etc. There was one depicting the making of snow angels and Julia was intrigued. It's the first thing she wanted to do when it snowed.



We were unprepared when the snow fell - without a sled or waterproof mittens for Julia. We went to Sports Authority to get a sled, but they only had snow tubes. So Wayne went to Target in the same mall area and when he went back to Sports Authority because there were no sleds at Target either, he estimated that 10 or 15 tubes had been purchased in the 20 minutes he was gone. We weren't the only ones desperate to have fun with the snow.

Some kids had created a gigantic snow-leaf ball rolling it down a hill. Wayne and Julia put in a couple of pushes to contribute to the local snowball effot.

Reindeer Games

Different ways to play the game "Santa."

1. Carry around any type of bag with any type of object and distribute.
2. Order parents to sit on your lap and tell you what they want. Remind them that they can only ask for one present.
3. Instruct parents to fall asleep on couch. Place "present" before them or under the tree. Runaway giggling. When parents exclaim wonder about presents, come back and announce yourself. Ask them if they like their presents. Give them a hug and kiss and say that you must go.
4. Repeat #3, but this time, come back and correct their mistaken impression that Santa had come. It was Mrs. Claus and Mrs. Claus would not only like milk and cookies, but also hamburger. Cookies, milk and hamburger.
5. Instruct parent to behave badly. Scold them and tell them that they won't get a present. When they promise they will be good from now on, say that you might still give them a present, but they must be good.
6. No rules. Add your own variation of a Santa game.

Her Own Dentist

For a brief period of time (two months?), I could not get enough of "Jon & Kate +8," the reality show about a couple who had twins and septuplets. Wayne complained that every episode was the same, "It's always about how difficult it is to raise 8 kids." True, it was about how difficult it is to take 8 kids to (1) an amusement park, (2) a furniture store to buy bunk beds, (3) the dentist, etc . . .. Our friend, Ythan, joined in on the "Jon & Kate +8" bashing. "Why would I want to watch a show about taking kids to the dentist?" It's a logical question, but I enjoyed watching the episode anyway.
What is exciting as a parent is not anything objectively exciting. "First" anythings tend to bring about some kind of emotion in me. Julia's first trip to the dentist made me feel proud ("What a big girl" "She's handling it so well") and sentimental ("What a big girl, I remember when her first teeth were just coming in.") Julia has been to the dentist with both me and Wayne. She's sat on my lap while I got my teeth cleaned (left her home for the route canal). After coming back from our dentist, she'd mention that she wanted to go to her own "little dentist." She's pretty serious about the whole thing, like it's a privilege or rite of passage (not exactly sure what's going on in her head). Anyway, it was a good first trip to the dentist. No crying. Healthy teeth, but instruction from her dentist that fruit snacks are worse for kids' teeth than most candies. Oops, we have since listened to the dentist and cut back dramatically from her one to two pack a day habit.

A Boy

We are expecting a little boy next March. Both Wayne and I did not feel a preference for boy or girl, but Julia was quite clear that she wanted the baby to be a girl. In fact, the only regret I felt at hearing the news was that Julia would not get her sister. And I guess a silly sentimental regret that I won't get the chance to re-use some of my favorite wardrobe of hers.

Despite Julia's protest, "But I wanted a sister!" she's very excited about having "our" baby. In the first month after we told her, Julia stated that her baby doll used to be in her tummy and now is a big girl. And now, Julia supposedly has another baby in her tummy just like me. We hope she will keep to her word about wanting to read and sing to the baby and to help hold and feed him. We're realistic though, especially in light of accounts from friends who have recently had their second that the first has asked to "bring the baby back" or be left at home during the next "family" visit to grandma's. We're pretty sure she's going to be a great big sister, even though it might mean dressing him up in girl clothes and being too motherly (a la Ruby, from Max and Ruby, if you watch Nickelodan) from time to time. As for us, we only figure we'll be able to survive having two little ones because other people do it. We're surely as competent as others, aren't we? In any case, it's the same reasoning we had when we had Julia and I think that for the most part, it held true. The excitement, love and fun will be worth the noise, worry and effort. That's our leap of faith.

Suburban Farming

From Wayne's efforts this past year, we have enjoyed strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, tomatoes, cucumbers, corn and carrots. The cherries are courtesy of a thirty-foot high cherry tree in our backyard.


The corn, which Wayne did not cultivate with any effort aside from planting seeds, was . . . interesting. Aside from the funny look, it tasted bean-y. If you crossed a lima bean and corn, this is probably what you would get. So if you wanted corn, you would not like Wayne's corn, but if you wanted bean-corn, this is the stuff.

When Wayne pulled up a carrot in August, it was about 2 inches long. Last week, he got better results. Julia ate them all.

She Wants Her Binky

Julia has been a binky baby. Sometime around 18 months, they no longer allowed binkies at school and Wayne and I followed their lead to banish the binky except for nap and bedtime. It was a rough couple of days and what I imagine to be akin to drug withdrawal (at the baby level). If you've never been close to someone with a binky addiction, you might not realize how serious it is. When Julia was still breastfeeding, she sometimes would stop, take a drag from her binky and then go back to feeding.

We've lived in harmony with the binky-only-in-bedroom arrangement for the past year and a half, but we'd been planning for the time to say good-bye to the binky forever. I'd read about strategies for getting kids to give up certain habits and settled on the binky fairy. The idea is that the "big girl" (or big boy) gives her binky to the binky fairy who will redistribute it to the babies of the world who truly need it. In exchange, the big kid gets a present and the good feeling of having been charitable. We've been telling her for the past few months that she would undergo this rite of passage when she turned 3.

At first, she thought that was fine, so long as the binky fairy would give the binkies back. When she understood that that was not the plan, she'd sometimes cry if we brought it up. Then she seemed to accept the idea and take comfort in the fact that she wouldn't turn 3 in awhile.

Julia just turned 3 this past Saturday. For the last several weeks, she's been more attached to the pacifier, sometimes excusing herself in the middle of the day to go up to her room and sit with one or even two binkies in mouth. If she could have articulated it, she would have said, "I don't have much time with them left. I just want to make every moment count." The day after her birthday, she just wanted to be with her binkies and seemed curious about why she still had them now that she was three. Before going out to a store, she said she wanted to give her binkies to the binky fairy. I felt unsure, but Julia was right, we needed to get over the dread. So we hung the binkies on our little dogwood and when we got back home, the binky fairy (one named Wayne) had left a bracelet/watch made of wooden beads and a rather wordy letter about how proud the binky fairy was of Julia, in their place. In good humor that lasted only for several minutes, Julia put the bracelet in her mouth.

Then she experienced buyer's remorse. This was hard for us too. As much as we want her to have good teeth and as much as we want her to be able to soothe herself without any props, it's not fun to take something away from your little girl that gives her so much comfort. And I was sentimental about saying good-bye to the binky and the little girl that needed them.

That night and the next were difficult. Whining about wanting her binky. Asking for a lollipop at bedtime. Crying and not going to sleep. The second night, I told her the binky fairy was in China and couldn't come back with her binkies, but we could sing about the binky. I sang the song that I used to sing in the morning to remind her to put the binky away before coming downstairs. To the tune of the restaurant Chili's advertisement for baby back ribs, it went, "Please put your binky back, binky back, binky back, please put your binky back, binky back binky back. Biiinnkkyy, oh binky back." She was amused, but then told me to stop singing that song. She requested that I sing a never-before heard song, "She Wants Her Binky."

It was two nights of pain, but she seems okay now. Older, wiser, 3.

Polite

Going through "old" video clips. This one from December 2007 is how Julia and Ralphie co-exist. I didn't realize how much her pronounciation has improved this year until looking back.

Princesses, Bad Mommies Part 2

There is a lot of the summer I would like to recap, but before I fall further behind, I just want to record two "events" of last week in which I suffered in my role as "bad mommy." (See entry on Princesses in Archive). First, Christina Aguilara's song, "Beautiful," comes on the radio and I think as I begin to sing along that it's never too early for Julia to learn the good message of this song. Julia learns no lesson, however, because she immediately begins strenuously objecting. Julia: "You're not beautiful. Princesses are beautiful."
Me: "But people who are not princesses can be beautiful too."
Julia: "You are a bad mommy. Bad mommies are not beautiful."

Second, in our inaugural playing of Candyland, I drew the Ice Cream Card (which, you might remember is a great card because it places you near the very end). Unfortunately, the new Candyland features pictures of Kings and princesses along with the candy and the Ice Cream Card also has a picture of a princess on it. Julia had seen that Ice Cream Princess Card before we even started playing and was hoping to draw it. When I pulled it from the deck, she assaulted me and started a mini-tantrum.

Julia: "You can't have that princess card. You're a bad mommy. I'm a princess. Waaauugghh."

We have a long way to go before we can play board games like regular people.

8 Adults, 4 Toddlers, 1 Teenager

all crammed into Wayne's parents' shorehouse for the July 4th Weekend. Someday soon, they will build an addition to the house. For now though, all 13 people survived, and happily so, sharing a 2-bedroom, 1 bathroom house for the weekend. In addition to Wayne's family, our sister-in-law's brother and family were visiting from out of the country.

Julia went out with Wayne on Baba's boat for some successful crabbing.



Julia the explorer, and looking the part. She loved stirring the water and sand with her shovel and called the whole process "Jelly Guppy." It makes no sense, but it sure is fun to say.


For the family album.



Aunt Rose, or GrandAunt Rose's house is very close to Nana and Baba's shorehouse. Can you believe they make such awesome play pools that you can purchase for your own backyard?




It was a very nice weekend, but I don't think we'll be doing the 13 people all together thing at once anytime soon.

Winning the Argument

Julia's younger cousin has recently gone through a biting phase as many toddlers are wont to do. A couple of weeks ago, he bit Julia. There was no damage and we haven't talked about it since. But Julia brought it up yesterday.

Julia: Lorenzo (the older and currently more favored cousin) is nice. Sometimes, Joaquin (the younger cousin) bites me.

Me: Well, Joaquin only bit you once and he was sorry and I don't think he will bite you again.

Julia: But sometimes, Joaquin bites me.

Me: Well, you don't remember, but when Lorenzo was little, he bit you once. But now he's grown up and doesn't do it anymore. Joaquin is still little. He's learning and isn't going to do it anymore. EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES (I pat myself on the back for coming up with this gem of a life lesson).


Julia: But . . . EVERYONE DOESN'T BITE ME.


Um, even though my life lesson stands, I think Julia wins the argument.

Controlling Obnoxious Behavior

That's the title of a section of a book called, "1-2-3 Magic, Training Your Children To Do What You Want!" I had hoped that I was all set for how to deal with tantrums and other problem behaviors just from watching "Supernanny," but apparently not (even though Supernanny is awesome!). Before having Julia, I was ambivalent about the controversies surrounding corporal punishment. Wayne, good pediatrician that he is, was/is against it and an enthusiastic advocate of the Supernanny's favorite discipline tool, the "Time Out." I remember a few incidences of corporal punishment used on me and don't think it's necessarily that bad. It was in a specific moment that I decided, however, to avoid it. My brother, who was probably 14 at the time, got me really angry and I grabbed his arm hard. I had an epiphany as I saw how quickly I could lose my temper and resort to uncontrolled violence if I didn't make a conscious decision to Say No To Spanking.

That decision has held up well and good and not been tested until this past June when Julia seemed to perfect the art of tantrum jumping, floor-writhing, screaming and hitting. Around 20 months or so, Julia "experimented" with hitting, but time-outs seemed to cure it. Although Julia's recent hitting was also in pediatrician-speak, a matter of "testing her limits," it was certainly more knowing and exact and we had less patience for it. Moreover, Julia seemed to be developing immunity to time-outs. For about two weeks, we were at a parenting nadir. There were two instances of slapping back on my part and one on Wayne's. We began to doubt the virtue of trying to always remain calm and consistent. Perhaps Julia needed to know that we had limits too. Perhaps our punishments needed to be more varied and unpredictable. After witnessing a 5+ minute tantrum (really not sure how long it was) my grandmother suggested that I give her 3 firm spanks, hard enough to make an impression. When I told her that Wayne was against that, she told me to do it but not tell my husband. Though I didn't take her advice, I appreciated her desire to help and her tough-minded ways. (This is a woman who can kill a cockroach by hitting it with a slipper thrown across the room!)

The lowest point and the turnaround point? Flying back from CA alone with Julia, she threw a tantrum when we were in the coat closet-like space of the airplane bathroom. I have no idea what people could hear from the outside. But inside, after my glasses were thrown to the floor (yuck!) and other unthinkable things, my epiphany came back. I didn't enjoy being Angry Mom and was not any more successful than Firm, but Patient Mom. I needed to keep cool to get us out of the situation. I offered her some control - to flush the toilet, to turn on the water to wash her hands - and we were able to exit the bathroom with a little dignity.

Since then, we've recomitted to the principles of infinite patience, time-outs, and 1-2-3 countdowns (I recommend the book). I may also try a jar of marbles suggested by my friend, who puts in marbles in a jar when her daughter listens and does good things and takes them out if she doesn't behave. When the jar is full, they go to the toy store and her daughter gets to pick out a toy.

I am often tempted to videotape a full-on tantrum, but it's difficult to pull off without making the tantrum worse. But I got this muted tantrum on tape with our dog Ralphie's typical tantrum response. He howls and barks and the situation is that much more unpleasant. We still can't figure out if it's because he's distressed, competing or just trying to make sure we realize that Julia is upset. Someday, we think we'll be able to laugh about all of this.


Carol

I Waaant Cauliflowwwer

Wayne: "Good night Julia. I'm turning off the lights."

Julia: "Nooo. I want to eat cauliflowwwer."

Although Julia loves fruits and vegetables, even cauliflower, that has got to be one of the worst bedtime stall lines ever uttered.

Borough of Trees

While we were away in California, a freak storm passed over our area and much damage was inflicted. Several large trees were uprooted around town. In our case, part of the railing on our deck was damaged as well as some parts to the siding of the house. Just last year we had had the tree trimmed, but I guess you never can tell which branch is going to snap. Another branch fell across the fence of two of our neighbors. On the other side, a neighbor's garage now has a large whole in the roof as a branch plunged straight down. His insurance says repair will cost $6500! Wayne's dad has made a temporary fix to our railing and I suppose we should do something about our siding, but only after our basement is finished!


Driving along the streets, there were great piles of branches in front of nearly every other house. It was quite a sight to behold when getting back from Cali.

Uncle Andrew's Graduation

Posted by Carol:

Graduation ceremonies are often crowded messes that last one speech and many names too long. So we were anxious about whether Julia would last through my brother's high school graduation. With the help of Moon Sand (a new form of play doh), a lollipop and a bottomless bag of potato chips, Julia behaved very well. And against my expecations, she enjoyed the reading of the names. She'd say, "Rebecca again? Ha ha ha." Then she just started laughing at names like a crazy person.

I'm not sure what Julia thinks graduation is, but she knows that it is a celebration involving special caps and dresses (gowns) and lots of lots of names. So I guess she has a pretty fair understanding. She's just missing the part about fifteen more years of daycare and school before she can attend her own high school graduation.

Cousins on The ABCs

Julia loves her cousins, Lorenzo and Joaquin. Sometimes, there is brutal violence. Always forgiveness. Sometimes there's just sweetness.

THE DIAPERLESS LIFE @ 32 Months

Posted by Carol:

This post is not for the poop-adverse. I suppose most of us are poop-adverse, but after having a dog and kid - I guess I'm more poop-weary than adverse. It is what it is, you know?

There were actually very few accidents during Julia's potty training - which I'd say took place during the first two weeks of May - although I suppose it only officially ends when we no longer congratulate her everytime for using the potty successfully. Wayne and I were lucky in that once Julia seemed ready to try this time around - she did not require much in the way of rewards (like hot wheel cars, princess dolls, or sticker reward charts). In fact, as she loves birthdays, the happy birthday song and simulating birthdays - all we had to do was light a candle, sing her the happy birthday song and let her blow it out. For "number 2" we gave her a lollipop. She still expects one when she remembers.

As long as she needs us to help her get up and down the potty, I suppose it'll be hard not to congratulate her for going pee and poo. I mean we're right there and it seems so jaded not to be happy about it. Julia has no concerns about privacy - I think it's more nature than nurture, even though Wayne and I have had an open bathroom door policy. Some of my friends' kids, unlike Julia, would leave for another room or go behind a curtain to go poo poo. Julia has been kicked out of the bathroom twice, once by her cousin and once by her friend, who must have been thinking, "Why are you hanging around when I'm doing my business?" I'm going to admit that as much as I look forward to not having to help Julia everytime she has to go, I am sentimental at this point, at the thought of not being part of that aspect of her life someday. Twisted, I know. Reminiscent of Stockholm's Syndrome, I think.

So, while it was relatively painless with potty training this past month - it was a long journey to get to this point. It started when I briefly considered the "early toilet training" or "elimination communication" movement, in which parents supposedly learn their childrens' rhythms and how to cue babies to poo or pee. I had thought it might be a nice environmental gesture to reduce Julia's diaper waste. And at 5 months, I did hold Julia over the toilet once for a succesful bowel movement, but I just couldn't follow through with it - didn't really believe I could pick up on her rhythms and teach her how to go on cue. Supposedly though, more than 50% of kids worldwide are potty trained by age 1, so if you have the initiative, go for it and let me know how it goes.

Then, when Julia was only 21 months old, she made a connection of what poo poo and pee pee were and used the potty successfully for a couple of weeks. We gave her stickers and stamps when she was successful. Why did the potty training fail back then? For one, I don't think we were ready for the work involved. For all the complaints about diaper changing - they are actually pretty convenient. But I guess she might not have been that ready either, we'd have to wait a long time while she'd sit on the potty readying books, singing songs, for anything to happen. She also had many accidents, and didn't really seem to mind the fact.

I can't remember for sure, but I think it was one particular accident that got me to postpone potty training last year. Ready for most awful diaper training story, ready? While cleaning up a poo poo accident, Julia had another poo poo accident - semi-diarahea. Not realizing the latter, I turned around to find Ralphie eating the poo. The Horror - The Horror! Julia got her squinty-eyed puzzled look face. I just explained that yes, Ralphie is eating the poop, he should not and we're going to have to wipe his teeth. For all those who must still go down the path of potty training, here's hoping things go more smoothly.

To end, I just wanted to share a fun book and video (youtube link) , both with Japanese origins, that have been helpful in Julia's potty training. Enjoy and marvel in the honesty!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QFVoLz88hiU

http://www.amazon.com/Everyone-Poops-My-Body-Science/dp/0916291456

Cool Trick

This video is from December 2007, but had to be shared. Since birth, Julia has been able to eat while sleeping. For those of you who watch Yo Gabba Gabba, this is known as cool trick, cool trick!

Two and Two Make Five

POSTED BY CAROL:

Julia: I want that pink bagel.

Me: Oh, that's actually a pink frosted donut.

Julia: Aaaauuuuggghhhh! Waaaahhhh! (Tears flowing) It's a pink bagel!!!

Me: Um, sorry, it's a pink donut.

Julia: Aaaauuuuggghhhh! Waaaahhhh! (Tears continuing) It's a pink bagel!!!

Me: Okay, okay, it's a pink bagel.

Julia: [silence] (Walks away from me with cold glance). It's a donut mommy.

Ouch, that was a good reminder of how Julia owns me. Also appropriate that Julia would remind me of how a toddler's tantrums has the power of torture a la Orwell's 1984, where the narrator capitulates to his handler and agrees that reality is what Big Brother says it is, even if it means that 2 + 2 = 5, or that a donut is a bagel. Julia was the narrator's great love in 1984 before she betrayed him to Big Brother. In high school, I had a short list of name possibilities for future children and Julia was one of them. After reading 1984, the name Julia seemed synonomous with duplicitous. I guess I forgot about that when we picked Julia's name, so it's funny that I would now remember this through Julia's Big Brother-like behavior.

I've learned my lesson that I must try to hold out against Julia's insistence on her own fake reality. So when I got home last night and she was eating a blue lollipop and told me that she had gone poopy on the potty at school, and then Wayne told me that she had not done so, and then Julia started bawling - tears streaming, snot flowing, and blue water coming out of her mouth - crying, "I pooh poohed on the potty (a supposed requirement for getting lollipops)" it was very hard, but both Wayne and I stood our ground and refused to comfort her by agreeing that she had pooh poohed on the potty when in fact, she had not. We moved on to things we could agree on, like watching "Little Einsteins."

It's very interesting, this stage, when it's apparent that she's tired of being corrected about the nature and names of things and also into creating her own stories. A lot of times it's fun to go along with her imaginative universe, but I don't think potty training will work if we just pretend it's happening. Potty training - I'll treat you all to a post about that later.

B-Earth-Day Boy

POSTED BY CAROL:

Maybe when we hit 40, Wayne and I will motivate to celebrate each other's birthdays like we do for Julia. For the lack of planning ahead, I think Wayne had a pretty good birthday though. The original plan to try for the first time - the super popular Mario Batali Babbo in NYC, somehow ended up as a first time try of Lee's Hawaiian Islander in Lyndhurst. It was a fun campy experience. We forgot to bring a camera, but evidently, there are people who like to share their polynesian restaurant experiences online. http://offthebroiler.wordpress.com/2006/07/10/nj-dining-lees-hawaiian-islander/ My favorite decoration was the puff fish hanging pendant light (unfortunately not shown in the previous link). I think we might venture to go there again to check out Friday karaoke nights. I'm glad we went there because I'm one of those annoying people who say they appreciate "character," but then is usually kind of afraid to actually patronize the old untrendy restaurant.

Anyway, on Wayne's actual birthday, we went to the New York Aquarium, which is in Coney Island. Nathan's Hot Dogs and the Friendly Walrus were the highlights.

It was a weekday, but as it was Passover week, the Aquarium was packed with big Orthodox Jewish families. Most of the families I saw had at least three kids and often the kids would be dressed the same - I guess to help keep track of one another more easily. My favorite family outfit was the Burberry button-down shirts with either black dresses or pants, depending on if they were girl or boy. Very sharp!

We ended the day at Wayne's parents and had a Carvel Fudgie the Whale Ice Cream Cake. Unfortunately, when picking up the cake, Wayne - defending my honor (at least in my mind) - had words with the Carvel ice cream shop guy. Wayne told him that he shouldn't complain about writing on cakes because that was his job. He replied that he didn't have time for me to be changing my mind about what I wanted written. If that's the case, I guess he shouldn't have asked, "just Happy Birthday? no name?" Because then, of course I changed my mind and said, "okay, put down Happy Birthday Wayne." HAPPY BIRTHDAY WAYNE!

Crazy Mama

Posted by Carol:

Today I threw sticks at a squirrel. The squirrel bullied his way into my tranquil "Snow White" moment washing dishes and watching the cardinals and sparrows waiting in line at the suet feeder. He cut in line and wouldn't budge when I tapped the window. I ran past Julia, who was eating her breakfast, and told her that the squirrel was eating the birdies' food again. I'm glad she didn't see me throwing sticks at the squirrel. Though the little rascal deserved it, it's not behavior I want to teach Julia. You know, crazy suburban mama behavior.

Unrelated note today. A classmate bit Julia at school - she was holding a toy he (she?) wanted. She told me when I got home. "Syd bit me. He was my friend." Aww.

Princesses Part I

Posted by Carol:

Assuming that Julia will not soon escape the clutches of Disney's Princess Empire, this is Part I of a series on princesses and how to live with and raise one. Wayne and I did not princess-ify Julia's world for the first two years.

Then, after Halloween, after seeing how cute one of her classmates looked dressed up as Snow White, we thought, it couldn't hurt to shop Disney's after-Halloween sale, could it? Instead of the normal $45 price, I got a Snow White get-up for only $20. When she first tried it on, I couldn't help it, none of us could help it - we all oohed and ahhed and said she looked sooo pretty. So of course, she has gone through a period of wanting to wear that dress ALL THE TIME!

Sometimes, when she's lost her train of thought, she just blurts out, "Ima a princess, I'm Snow White." She's chosen seven of her stuffed animals to be her Seven Dwarves. We sing a variation of the Snow White song, "Someday my prince will come." And sometimes, Dad is the prince and I'm the "bad mommy." (NOTE: Disney does not foster good mom-daughter relationships. Moms are either dead or bad. Think Bambi, Nemo, Lilo, Snow White, Cinderella, Belle) Anyway, see brief clip below (Julia says, "Give me a bad apple. Give me a kiss."):

The Basement

POSTED BY CAROL:
The basement was finished when we bought the house, but in the first six months, we had four different water issues ((1) frozen water pipe outside the house burst and flooded; (2) 100+ year pipe broke and resulted in a slow leak; (3) when the plumber fixed that pipe, some debris must have got loose and blocked the pipe further down the line so that water backed up into the bathroom and flooded our floor; and (4) last but not least, bad grading on one side of the house resulted in water seepage during big storms) that effectively ruined the possibility that we might use it. The silver linings are that we've learned a lot about caring for your home and fixed various issues and now Wayne and his dad are working to make it into the "basement of our dreams." Though I supposed the real basement of our dreams would have more head room. At about 6' 7", not sure we'll be to fit a treadmill in there that Wayne could use without having to hunch over.

They've encountered some interesting things. The scary part (okay, Wayne not a scared as me) - mold on a lot of the sheet rock, but fortunately, just the sheet rock. The different kind of scary part, see picture below.

The previous owner told us an artist had once lived in the basement as a separate apartment. I can see why the artist did not become famous. Wayne somehow first saw the guy as an alien, but I'm pretty sure most other people see the devil. We've covered him back up now. At least he was drawn in more of jovial way I think, not so menacing.

Anyway, Wayne and his dad have been working very hard and Julia is very excited to see her new playroom. When it's done, we'll share the results.

Baby White Tunnel

posted by Carol:



aka a MRI machine. But to Julia, it's a baby white tunnel. Sounds fun, right?

Julia is prone to febrile seizures, which just means, seizures brought on by sudden high fevers. There's no lasting harm and no cause other than a fever. Evidently, before the age of five, 4% of kids will experience a febrile seizure. But when one parent has had a febrile seizure, then a child's chance of febrile seizure is 50%. I had one as a kid, so it makes sense that Julia has them too. She had two last year. The first one happened with her grandparents as they were heading to Wayne's practice. Because we didn't see it, we didn't realize how scary it was for her poor grandparents and I didn't even realize it was a febrile seizure. The only thing that worried Wayne a little bit was that for a couple of minutes, she was completely limp on the right side of her body. That's atypical of febrile seizures, but not unheard of.

The second one happened while at Wayne's friend's house. She was really not herself, so I tried breastfeeding her to calm her down. I think it was the way she started clamping down, that it occurred to me that she might be having a seizure. I called out to Wayne, who was helping his friend clean up after a party, but I was also imagining the insanity of trying to simultaneously deal with Julia's seizure and a broken bloody boob, so I was working hard to free myself from her as well. Anyway, even though I now know there's no real danger from a febrile seizure, I didn't know it then and the thought that she was dying flashed through me. Felt very powerless. Could not even imagine how Wayne's mom had dealt with it. I hadn't ever witnessed a seizure, and it's pretty darn scary, with the eyes rolling, mouth frothing, the rigid shaking. And I hear that epileptic seizures are even more scary! Anyway, we went to the ER after that one. Again it was atypical.

She had her third (atypical) febrile seizure a couple of weekends ago. Wayne was alone with her driving, and keeping an eye on her because he knew that a fever had started. She went rigid and didn't respond to his calling her for a minute? Hard to tell the time for such a thing.

The neurologist said that even though he felt confident that everything was fine, we might as well get a MRI of her brain, just so we wouldn't have to worry anymore.

To prepare Julia, I showed her pictures of the machine that I found online and tried to describe it in terms that she would like. She likes tunnels, and look it's a small tunnel, oh, so cute like a baby. It's a baby white tunnel! Somehow, Julia decided that not only would she see a baby white tunnel in the hospital, but that Mickey Mouse would be there too. I should have corrected her, but paid for it later when a slurring delirious toddler was sobbing the whole car ride home that she wanted to see Mickey Mouse in the hospital. Um, anyway, overall it went well. She's good with doctors and needles, and the results show she's got a perfectly normal brain. So Julia is good to go.

First Fun Snow of Winter

Wayne gets credit for the nicely shaped snowman . Julia's contribution was deciding that the snowman needed a heart (this was just days after Valentine and a Valentine's Day Lollipop came in handy). Unfortunately, days later, as the red color bled down its chest, it looked like our snowman had been shot!

There's a very very mild hill a block away from us. Julia's too big for that infant sled, but we only used it once last year. If we get to use it one more time, I won't feel like it was a waste.

POSTED BY CAROL:

During the first week of February, we traveled to CA to see family and friends and timed our visit to coincide with Chinese New Year's. Julia was super excited about the trip and jumped the gun for some of the things she was anticipating. As soon as the plane got into the air, she asked, "Where is Puo Puo (my mom)?" As soon we landed, she said, "We're going to see the parade with dragons."

We had a fun Superbowl with my high school girlfriends, their husbands and babies (the Giants are my new team! It's not just because they're winners, which they are, but most of you probably know that we live within 10 minutes of Giants Stadium). Who knew frozen microwavable Tysons buffalo chicken strips could be so tasty? I know, it certainly doesn't sound good. Julia is still talking about Sofie and Jack. I really wish we could see them more often.

We met up with them one other time in Huntington Beach for some yummy Wahoo's and a beautiful day at the beach, complete with cool "bubble guy."

Disneyland was lots of fun too - despite a 15 minute meltdown, complete with thrashing on the floor (by Julia, of course). Some passers-by were sympathetic, others smug. I overheard one mom explain to her husband, "They just get over tired sometimes." (Inside, I thanked her for her understanding) We collected ourselves at the Princess Stage, where we heard a story (probably cryptic for Julia and more cringe-inducing for me than I expected) told by Princess Aurora a/k/a Sleeping Beauty. We felt like the most horrible parents for taking her on the Snow White ride (forgot that it's called Snow White's Scary Adventures), but redeemed ourselves with Dumbo and the Teacups.

Unfortunately, we committed another major parenting no-no when we took Julia to the Chinese New Year Parade in L.A.'s Chinatown and decided to watch the fireworks up close. We realized it might be too loud, but we kinda forgot about the smoke and soot filled air. Julia was sitting on my shoulders while Wayne filmed the segment below. We don't know if Julia was screaming because we couldn't hear a thing - I thought about running away, but thought that might be more traumatic. So all we could do was huddle while Wayne covered her ears. Luckily, she's okay. We all later agreed that the firecrackers needed shush-ing and that they scared the dragons away.

We're lucky that the weather is so great in CA and that there's so many fun things to do there when our main purpose is just to visit family. I also feel lucky that Julia seems to really appreciate my parents, stepmom, brother and grandparents even though we don't see them often.

Julia's Dollhouse

Just wanted to show off Julia's new dollhouse that she got for Christmas. My dad and I spent many hours on this project, because I couldn't be happy with a classic Victorian. Santa provided the family and furniture.